Results Are In

I heard from Vanderbilt this morning, and the news isn't what we were hoping for. My CA125 has gone up and my scan shows 2 new spots. 

To be honest, I was prepared for this. Not because I haven't been praying or believing that God was working, but because of how God was preparing me over the last week. I know that sounds strange, but it's true.

I had people randomly stopping to pray with me about my appointment. And while they were praying for a miracle and how God would be glorified through that healing, I knew in my heart that God would be glorified even if the news was bad. Obviously, I prefer good news, but God can use the bad along with the good.

I was supernaturally calm in the days leading up to the scan and appointment. Like no anxiety, which was not normal. My devotions Monday morning were from Thessalonians where it says: 1. Rejoice always. 2. Pray constantly. 3. Give thanks in all circumstances. That is not a coincidence, friends. 

I won't pretend that I'm not shaken by this, but I also knew that this day would eventually arrive. My heart hurts mostly for Brian and the kids. This will be tougher on them than me.

I leave in a couple of hours to see Becky, and the plan is to compartmentalize this news until I see my doctor Monday morning to discuss treatment options. I am going to shop until I drop. Linger over coffee. Talk photography. Show off my new full-frame camera (hello, breaking news!!). Eat ice cream and cupcakes.

Comments

Owlhaven said…
Melissa, I'm praying for you and your precious ones...
Mary
Krista said…
oh no Melissa... sending you and your family lots of positivity and prayer. xo
I am praying for you. First, to have a fabulous time with your sister! There is nothing like a sister, or two or three or four, in my case!!! Secondly, praying for the treatment options to be something that "fits" you and your life!
Julie said…
I am praying for you. May the time with your sister be just what you need!
Unknown said…
Praying for you and your family. Stay strong.
VinGirl said…
Thinking of you and your family, Melissa.
Anonymous said…
What a fun trip to take! Hope you guys have a blast!
Oh, Melissa. I'm not going to lie. My heart hurts for you and yours.

I hope you have an incredible weekend with Becky... I hope you take lots of fabulous photos... and eat lots of yummy, yummy stuff.

HUGS.
~amy~ said…
thinking of you and your family
Vicky said…
Embracing you with love and infusing my thoughts with hope and peace. I often feel as though "I know, before I know." And you just described that perfectly.
xxoo
Danyelle said…
Melissa, I'm so sorry to hear this. My heart aches for you and your family. But I am so encouraged by what you wrote...God will be glorified no matter what the answer. You being faithful to Him no matter what answers you are given is a testament of your faith in Him and encourages me as I walk my Christian walk. Prayers for the upcoming week...
Amanda said…
Praying for you!
Thinking of you.

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