Kill Cancer, Take 4

When Becky was going through treatment for breast cancer, Micah always called chemo days Kill Cancer Days. I adopted the term and now here we are almost 4 years later starting my fourth set of chemo treatments. As a review:

  • May 2011-September 2011: the terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad mix of Taxol, Carbo, Cistplatin
  • September 2011-December 2011: the not-so-bad Gemzar
  • July 2012-December 2012: the hotly disputed and very expensive Avastin with the milder Topotecan
  • December 2014 - ??: the we-have-high-hopes-for Doxil

My very awkward attempt at an infusion selfie that did not involve a nurse walking in on me. Because, hello, embarrassment.

On the positive side, Vanderbilt has some perks when it comes to infusion. Not only do I have my own room with 2 recliners and a personal TV, they have snack and drink service as well as automatic Ativan with infusion. Score.

On the negative side, We were here before 8:00 this morning. It is now 10:46, and we have been to 5 different check-in points and I have still not actually started chemo. I have had the pre-drugs: a steroid (friends from back in the old cancer days might remember the steroid makes me very, very chatty), Ativan, and Zofran (for nausea). As I suspected, chemo days at Vanderbilt are going to be all-day events.

Brian brought papers to grade.

I may need to figure out how to do some scrapping on this laptop because it appears as if I will have time to do so on chemo days. Now that we're back in my own private area, my feet are propped up, I've got a little anti-anxiety medicine in my system and steroids to make me hyper productive. 

Last night I was feeling a little bit cranky about the whole idea of starting treatment again, and Camden said to me, "why are you upset? Look at all the things you have to be thankful for: friends and family who love you and pray for you; co-workers who pray for you; all your internet people who like you; church people who pray for you; daddy's co-workers who are bring you meals; God who pops verses into your head; good doctors to take care of you." 

I stopped him at that point because he. is. totally. right.

I unexpectedly have the rest of the week off work, which makes me feel good. I'm hoping it allows me time to rest as well as gives me a good idea of how my body is going to react to this chemo without the stress of work. Next week is a very busy work week so I'm hoping that these extra days off will actually make next week easier. 

Considering the bag of steroids that just went straight through my system, you can probably expect me back writing on a more regular basis over the next couple of days. :)

Thanks for the prayers, friends.


Karen said…
I love it when you're chatty! Prednisone does that to me, too, but I take it every day, so... poor Rob. ;-) I am praying this chemo does it job (Kill all the cancer!) and that it's not too rough for you. I should send you a selfie of how I am looking today, the day after my treatment. Rest assured if there were a contest for beauty during chemo, you. totally. win.
Keela said…
Uuuuuugggggggggghhhhh! I hate to see this! :( I have been wondering how you were doing because I haven't seen you around much. (I must not be in the right places?!) Well, now I know a little and I'll be praying a LOT. Hugs, my friend. Sounds like Camden knows what's up! (What he said made me tear up!)
Monica said…
"God who pops verses in your head..." that made me laugh, even though it is so true. Praying for all of you as you start this chapter.
Even though we have never met, I've been following you since the Gitzen Girl days. Praying for all of you! ...and Prednisone makes me crazy, laughing one minute and crying for no reason the next! Always makes for an interesting day!
Unknown said…
Praying for you to have a peace beyond words...even with the "chatty drugs" :)
VinGirl said…
Fingers crossed that your kill cancer days do just that. At least you'll be able to do tons of journaling on your pages with your brain moving that fast. :P
Trece said…
Praying that this will be the treatment that, with the help of Jehovah Raffa will use to kick cancer to the curb forever. Continuing to pray for you daily!!
I love it when you are chatty too... Glad Camden was there to give some perspective last night. Praying for the days ahead... unwelcomed by us for sure, but not unknown in the eyes of the Savior. Praying God's best for you, Brian and the kiddos. Here's to a 4th and final round to kick cancer to the curb!
BabblingBrooke said…
Praying here for you and what sweet boy! Brooke
digiscrapthat said…
Melissa, you have done an amazing job with Camden. He seems to know just what to say and when to say it! Just goes to show you that God really does hand pick our children for us. He knew that Camden would be wise beyond his years and that would help you immensely during this nasty journey you are on. You are a woman of amazing faith and strength and an inspiration to us all. I will be praying for you that this truly does KILL all the cancer. Stay strong. Jen (Mom to Kimmee, Kaylee & Tyler)
April Morgan said…
You've got People!
Love and Prayers from my port to yours!
Joanna B said…
First, you look beautiful! Second, I will be praying that those kill cancer days are super productive!
"your internet people who like you". That's the one that cracks me up!


One of your internet people who like you
bodegalee said…
I very much enjoy the "chatty you"! AND dont think I've ever seen a prettier patient undergoing chemo! :)
Please tell Camden he blessed me when I read his words! Also please tell him that you and your family have people in Japan who pray every day for you all, too!
You really do look beautiful, Melissa! Love and prayers, Judy Turnbough Bailey
Mayme said…
So glad you have a few days off to rest and let your body figure this med out. And that sweet boy of yours!!! What a blessing. We love you guys and are praying for you all. I'm totally interested in that Ativan infusion:-)
Unknown said…
Hi Melissa,
Your wonderful mom is a new friend of mine! She shared some of your journey with me and so I've begun praying for you and your family. May our great God flood you with grace, strength and peace. Beth
I'm all teary reading Camden's words. He's so right...

And hello, beautiful!!! You look amazing considering where you are!!!
Mary DeGennaro said…
Out of the mouths of babes......amazing....I am praying for you, Melissa....Love following your blog...your kids are adorable.

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