In September 2012, we traveled to Oklahoma to celebrate Becky's 5-year remission milestone. My mind worked double-time that weekend as I struggled to ignore the fear that kept trying to creep in. When that sweet weekend with friends and family was over and it was time for us to go, Becky began to cry as she hugged me and told me I was going to have 5 years one day. My own tears flowed, of course, and what I didn't say out loud was that I didn't believe her.
Today, however, marks 5 years. Not 5 years of being cancer-free, but 5 years since my diagnosis. Five years, my friends, is a big win.
I've changed in five years. There has been anger, fear, grief, acceptance. My kids are forever marked by the experience. Occasionally I catch a glimpse of just how much, and it is so hard. I'm not sure what our lives would look like in 2016 without cancer, but I know that God has walked with us these past years. I know He is good. I know He has a plan to redeem the hard stuff. I know that He will walk with us for the next 5 years.
We celebrated, as we always do on this day, with ice cream for breakfast. Mint chocolate chip ice cream at 7:30 on a Wednesday morning is always a good thing.